Call of Duty: Modern Warfare is officially out today, but we’re still in office hours across many parts of the world. (Yes, hello, it’s me, I’m at work.) Maybe you had the foresight to schedule some vacation time to spend the day with the latest in the venerable series of FPS games, but if not, Activision has you covered with a prewritten sick note.
And by ‘sick note,’ I mean ‘order to engage in classified military activity.’ The note says “I am writing to advise [BLANK] is to be relieved of all current duties commencing 0001 hours on October 25. The circumstances of their absence are of a highly classified nature, hence should not be subject to questioning due to the sensitivity of activities during the aforementioned time period.
“Their contribution to the task at hand is of International Importance. You may overhear them discussing preparations for their time away, and we advise that you do not engage. Please disregard terminology ‘loadout,’ ‘sesh,’ ‘we on,’ ‘no scope,’ and ‘them Ws.’ As a citizen, this is none of your concern.”
In a beautiful touch, the note is signed by Colin O’Duty.
— Call of Duty UK (@CallofDutyUK) October 24, 2019
You can get it on proper letterhead above if you need to make use of this excusing power.
Check out our Modern Warfare review for an in-depth explanation of why you should be playing it, or dig into the full Modern Warfare score roundup if you want a second (or third or fourth) opinion. We’ve also got a full list of Call of Duty: Modern Warfare weapons if you’ve got time to kill and still need to build your loadout.