Become the dead centre of town with medieval cemetery simulator, Graveyard Keeper

Graveyard Keeper

We’ve kept dungeons and watched enough heroes die in the middle of their epic quest but the question remains, where do their bodies disappear to? Hoping to answer that question, tinyBuild and Lazy Bear Games are partnering together again to bring players Graveyard Keeper, the “most inaccurate medieval cemetery management sim of the year”.

If you’re looking for some less morbid simulations, try out these top PC sim games.

Tasking you as a grizzled old gravedigger, Graveyard Keeper has players balancing the task of running an effective graveyard, with cutting enough corners to make a tidy profit. This may involve selling massively expensive coffins, selling off dead bodies to the highest bidder or even branching out past the grave digging business to run the local witch burning festival. Everything you do in Graveyard Keeper is in the pursuit of money, so get used to prizing cold, hard cash out of the cold, dead hands of any cadavers that come your way.

In between flinging corpses into shallow graves and selling off body parts to the local cannibal, gravekeepers will have to delve into nearby dungeons to gather resources for the next witch burning or to collect that really expensive wood to use for the mayor’s casket. You may even resort to poisoning the local villagers, just to get a little bit more business during a slow month. I’m sure no-one will be able to tell the difference if you used Old Man Morris’ innards to fill out your meat pies.

Graveyards aren’t the quietest of places either, as running your graveyard will mean chasing away the spirits of angry patrons, dealing with potential zombie outbreaks and occassionally smacking the odd skeleton back into the grave from whence it came. It’s not an easy job.

If you’re already rubbing your hands at the thought of being the most ruthless graveyard keeper there ever was, you can sign up for the Graveyard Keeper alpha over on its official site. The game is set to come out this summer, so keep an eye on the Graveyard Keeper Steam page for more information on this morose management sim.