You’re familiar with Jimmy Kimmel’s popular ‘Celebrities Read Mean Tweets’ segment. Famous faces read out particularly creative insults from their Twitter feeds, and you sit there and go, “Oh, I guess Katy Perry does have feelings after all.” But what happens when videogame celebs get in on the act, protagonists of major franchises with just as much bile directed at their social media profiles? Turns out: not much.
We’ve got no hate for Geralt. In fact, he features in our best PC RPGS.
In the parody vid created by Big Head Mode, Lara Croft, Sonic The Hedgehog, Big Boss, Mass Effect’s Liara, Geralt of Rivia, Mad Max, and… other videogame characters associated with Platforms That Shall Not Be Named all read choice words from their detractors, in the style of Kimmel’s segment. The curtain is a nice tough. The results, though, are mixed.
“Lara Croft you savage bitch you just gonna eat straight deer meat no cookin no nothin,” reads my personal favourite from @F***k_Jaime.
Geralt’s authentic armour also deserves praise, and is the most interesting thing about his brief appearance in which it’s suggested he might be lonely. Elsewhere though, it’s harder to summon anything approaching empathy for approximations of game protagonists facing faint criticism (such as Mad Max’s dog being a bit ugly, for example).
This writer’s favourite mean tweet read simply “I did not care for your Witcher review.” It’s so economical and inarguable, like a heckler standing up at a comedy show and shouting “I’m not finding any of this material funny.” Nothing you can say, is there?